I'm posting this here instead of sending out physical letters cause I don't have a printer at home & going to Kinko's with a three year old in tow is an adventure.
Aloha & greetings from the Little Red House in Portland!
To be terribly cliché for a moment, so much has changed. There have been so many big & little events this year that all add up to the joys & tantrums & dirty laundry & dog hair everywhere, it’s hard to know where to begin!
It helps that I started writing this (or the first draft at least!) when I was coming off a beautiful, long, relaxing holiday weekend. We spent it mostly together, Kade, Tom & me, with the super cuddly addition of a friend’s Border Collie Raven. We got to know each other’s families a bit better, ate a ton of good food, shopped & walked & cuddled & cooked & scarfed Elephant Ears at Saturday Market, played tickle the thrashing toddler & talked & watched movies & talked some more!
Welcoming Tom into our lives & working our way into his, with a possible view of “what could be ours” has been the most exciting-and strangely comfortable-surprise of the past year.
I have a ton of work yet to do, financially & career wise, to be even close to where I want to be personally. Tom not only understands this, but he’s willing to put in the work to build it. He brings his mechanical mind, hope, and patience to us with open hands & I’m as humbled by it as I am filled with hope myself. Just because we can do it alone doesn’t mean we can’t give our all to making a partnership work! After all, we have so many clear examples surrounding us; my parents at 16 years, his at 37; Kade’s grandparents & great grandparents on both sides, Tom’s grandparents & sisters, countless friends sharing & building & working & loving every day. That’s what we are both aiming for, building with sweat equity, a simple gesture here & there, & sometimes just agreeing that work sucks & why are there so many people on our planet?
I’m going to stop myself there, because if I go on much longer I’ll turn from a Hallmark card into a Hallmark movie.
The other big news of the year is that Kade moved up to preschool in March, & bam! His language & math skills just exploded from being around the older kids. He counts up to 20 now, sings the entire ABC, days of the week, & months of the year songs. Really, anything becomes a song for this dude now, he loves to sing everything! He also tells the most fantastical, in depth stories involving family, friends, Transformers, cooking, rescuing people, rockets & trips to a green moon & kicking bad guys butts & wild crashes! His days are filled with friends (Max, Logan, & George are his current BFF’s, check in next week for an updated list!), stories, songs, artwork, water tables, quiet naps & just all day fun play.
We rise early every morning to share a muffin, fruit, milk & cuddles. This always sets the day up just right! Lately at night we go home after I exercise, turn the tree lights on & race cars & monsters around the warm house before dinner, bath, story time & sleep.
Now, a quick story to illustrate many things, take your pick (happy family, the loveliness of being a grandparent, toddler mishaps, don’t do this parenting tips, etc):
Earlier this week I picked up the kid before working out because I didn’t want to be late. I watched Agents of Shield while on the elliptical & Kade battled bad guys & practiced his tumbling on the large gym mats. When I was done I headed upstairs, leaving Kade in the gym to put away the mats (slowly, heartbrokenly, sadly), since the rule is to put away his own toys (this rule works roughly half the time). Not three minutes after I made it upstairs & my kind, warm, helpful mother pointed out that leaving Kade alone in the basement wasn’t a wise choice, came the wail of pure toddler pain: Kade had shut his pinkie finger in the closet door.
I got some mom points taken away for letting that happen, but let’s be honest here: Who was it that let a 5 year old Jame loose with her friend Sally & an ATV, alone in the desert? Of course I flatly ignored my mother’s prohibition against me driving the thing, & of course I promptly popped the clutch & managed to drive the thing over my friend & I, but the point stands: Finger in door; being run over with an ATV. Thanks Mom! I love you! And so does Kade!
But now I think it’s time to actually brag about my dear adorable offspring, cause how often do I really get to do that? Kade is an awesome, willing kid when I really need him to be. Last weekend Marcia & Byron came up to take us out to Zoolights, which for the most part was oddly enjoyable. I say oddly because it was cold, most of the animals were out of sight eating in warm dens (except the bull elephant who was letting it all hang out) & there were oh my god so many freaking people. Thankfully my mother is smart, so we took the Max train up at 2pm after a good linner & the kid had napped. We were able to enjoy ourselves, wandering through the zoo as they turned the lights on & daylight slipped rapidly away. We only waited in line for the train (and the elephant ears!) for just over an hour. The kid absolutely loved the (short but still pretty) train ride, barely able to sit still. He loudly & enthusiastically thanked the zoo staff & the train driver on the way out. We made it home by 8pm with barely an incident. People just arriving to the zoo as we were leaving about 6pm faced a two to three hour wait in the dark with tired, cranky children; to get into the zoo, waiting for the train, then the overflow shuttle to the outer parking lots. No thank you!
But through everything, the crush of people, strange place, lack of animals, sugar rush & long lines, Kade was cheerful & happy. No tantrums, no tears, no “But Mommy!”; just thrilled, flirty, excited little dude. It helps that there were five adults to manage kid, stroller, & line duty. One of my best purchases of the year was that Bob stroller; I’ve more than wrung every cent of value from it & it’s still going strong!
I should also mention the current title holder of “World’s Best Boyfriend” again, cause he is pretty hot stuff. I could talk about him & my kid the same way I do about horses; at length, with joy, unstoppable. Just a few recent highlights instead: Tom helped me purchase, set up, & explained the basic care of Kade’s Christmas present, a red beta fish forever known as “Drag Race”; hung out with me, my mother, Marcia & Byron at the crazy packed Zoolights on one of his precious days off; helped us drive up the mountain, hunt down, cut down, & pack home our fat, sassy Christmas tree; purchased & watched Guardians of the Galaxy with me; took me out to the fancy theater to watch Mockingjay & put up with my total fan girl moments during the movie, including explaining the significance & meaning of the Hanging Tree song; & spent countless hours already helping me with my finances & budgeting.
So that pretty much sums us up this past year: Cuddles, loves, dog breath, shiny red Jeep of sexiness, broken arm & countless bruises, half marathon completion, hikes & long nights in the backyard hammock, picnics & dirt covered toddler, bike rides & training wheels, loving foster dogs & letting them go to new homes, experiments with breads & cakes & crock pots, songs, books, fountain splashing & hilarious toddler soccer classes.
We face next year with a bit more joy & hope together. I wish for all of you a year ahead that is smooth & wild, tasty & boring, laughing & loving & dreaming & supporting.
Yes, I’m hugely sappy right now, why do you ask?
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