I found it hard to write this post, since in the past few days the internet has been full of mostly one thing: Everyone's opinions on the tragedy in Aurora. Except for a few fringe people who blame the victims themselves for not knowing how to respond when someone starts shooting at them, most people agree that it was just that: a tragedy. And that is where the agreement ends. I feel compelled to write about it-but I promised this post first. As much as I feel like throwing my personal opinion out in to the void, I feel this-my ordinary, everyday, safe and quiet little part of the world-is important in its own way. In the midst of horror, life continues.
Kaeden is of the age that the biggest horror in his life is being told he cannot touch an item he wants, or being told no when he's touching it anyway. As much as I focus on the big wide world and try to find out where I stand, I know where I stand with Kaeden: I am his mother and I find more delight and more frustration in him, and in myself, every day.
Kaeden
My day starts with being awake and still being stuck in my bed. I can say that word now, bed, so I try it out a few times as I wake up. "Bebababed!" Still no response from parents so I kick my bed, huddling with my blankie for maximum cuteness effect. This brings in the momoma lady, who swoops me up and dumps me on the table and then I'm naked! Time to kick as wildly as I can giggling the whole time wee naked is fun!
No more naked now, dumped on sleepy papa's lap in bed, so I proceed to go wild giggling and thrashing and crawling all over the dog and Papa. Why is momoma leaving? NO NO NO not good! Crying will bring her back!
Nope, just papa who shoves a graham cracker in front of me. Mmmm cracker food. I stare at him and reach for the toaster when he can't see me and toss a bit of cracker at Mamamaggie. Mmm warm foods, eggies! Must drink messily! Gulp. Okay done now, I wiggle free of my prision and dash around, here's a book, what's dat papa? Truck? "Tuk?" "Close enough kid" "Puppup!"
Here's a drum, wee I make noise! Oh papa's computer, "No touch!" scream "WANT DAT!". Look cars! Chase Momomaggie with pusher watch her run, papa takes it away, evil face *snort* evil face twice! *snort*
"Go get the mama!" "Mamamammamamamamamama!!!" Sprint to her get swept up, tell her all about my morning with papa. She laughs kisses me all over, peeks in my diaper, wave goodbye at daddy!
Share cheese and cookies but not berries with momoma, try to share with momomaggie, told no, evil face!
Watch momoma get naked then not naked, grab noise maker when she can't see me, "No remote Kaeden, here book! Book!" "babook! What dat?" "Airplane." "DAT?" "Fire Truck"
Now not naked, NO NO NO kick flail squirm, NO NO NO, NO NOT NAKED, DYING HERE, EVIL FACE EVIL WAIL NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUN AWAY!!!
Shoes? "Shoooes?" Sit give momoma feet, shoes fun wee! Follow momoma pointing at everything, "DAT? DAT?" "No, library, books!" "Boooooks? DAT?" "Yes books."
OUTSIDE!!! RUN RUN RUUUUUUUUN! WEE!! Come momomaggie! "Bit? Dat?" "Bird" Water wee!! "Dat. want dat!" " No stream today, Squidge. Library."
Run! Come momomaggie come momoma! Run wee!!! NO HOLD! NO HOLD HAND! Squirm wiggle scream. RUN WEEEEEE!
"Come on, little lover man. Library. We're done at the post office." Push door open door! Booooks.....TWAINS!!!!! "Be nice to him, he's little he doesn't understand sharing." TWAINS TWAINS. Here momoma, DAT. Here momoma, twains dat babble.
Here, what dat? Dat? "It's a bat, little boy. Bat. That's a horsie and that's a book and that's a puzzle"
Follow other bigger boy, Here dat, here dat, what dat?
"Time to go, my big flirt. Home, eat, nap." "Home? Dat?" Run run wee, WATER!!!! "Yes fine, fountain for a few minutes, then we have to go home and eat and nap and let Maggie out!" WATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO! Want DAT! Want WATER!!! "Let's go, Squidge. Past your nap time little one." RUN WEEEEE!!!
"Momomaggie! weee! Naked weeeeee!!!!! Berries mmmmmnomnom!"
Blankie, momoma singing soft bed.
NO FAN! NO SLEEP! Play weee!!! Play weeeee.......blankie......zzzzzzz
PLAY! Make noise wee!!!!!Naked weee!!! Warm food mmmm, "Momomaggie" "No food for Maggie please, sit and eat your dinner." Papappapa!
RUN wee, in and out wee, chase pupup EVIL FACE PAPAPA! Crawl on couch, weeeee!
WATER!!! Bath! Bubububles and baaalls and splash and swim and "alkjadkfjadkjadamomomaajkjfakdjakdpapap!ajdkjadBALLS! BALLS!!! BUBBLES!!!!!malkdfadjakjPUPPUP!"
Naked wee!!!! NO catch me weee!!! Hide giggle scream tickle run!!!!
Ohh, blankie, ohhh thumb, "Dat?" "That's your story for tonight, little man. 'Billy and Blaze and the Forest Fire"
Bed. blankie. thumb. quiet.....zzz.....
Loud noise SCREAMMMM CRY SOB AHHHHH!!!! "Shhh honey baby man, it's okay, moma's here, it's over now, silly dog bark at stupid kids and their stupid cars, shhhhh sleep easy....." zzzzz
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